The Hedonistic Pleasureseeker

It’s shocking to discover cosmetics makers may still be using lead in their reddest lipsticks. Perhaps we pouty-lipped ladies would be better off switching to lip gloss until manufacturers get their act together.

hi, cum to Florida?… everyone else from Jersey is here?

- Some Guy

Never answer an online dating message in which your potential suitor spells come as “cum.”

These Coach peep toe pumps, perfectly tailored and comfortable (for heels), retailed at $250.

At DSW they were $170, STILL too much for this fashionista to pay. Unless they’re couture I won’t pay over $100 for any pair of shoes, ever. But DSW put this pair in the back room at 70% off so I grabbed them, put them on my feet and danced around screaming MINE MINE MINE! OK I didn’t really scream, but I did dance a little. Plus I had a $10 gift certificate, bringing the total price down to

$24 !!!

(Jag-U-Are, Rich Bitch Collection)

Hey Guys! I need you to do a little creative visualization for a moment!

Imagine you have a wife who cheats on you constantly, steals all your stuff, won’t let you touch her, and then has the gall to demand maintenance pay. Wait! There’s more! You don’t even get to divorce the bitch. You have to stay married to her and continue to give her money while she continues to shag the pool boy, rob you blind and fuck you over. WHY? Because she’s become “accustomed to the lifestyle,” and the government treats your money as if a significant portion of it were hers.

How would that make you feel? Kinda bad, yes?

Ladies, you do the same, plugging in whatever gender works for you. I actually know a woman whose unemployed husband demanded a huge chunk of her 401K when they divorced. They got married, he quit his job, and then left the marriage a year and a half later with a significant portion of her stuff, because she made more money than he did, because the whole time he was watching soap operas at home. She’s a little bitter about that.

The present plan to bail out Fannie Mae and Freddy Mac? Yeah, it’s like THAT.

“A capitalist in need is a socialist indeed.”

Most of us are under the mistaken assumption that the United States of America is a capitalist democracy. Well, it’s not. It’s a corporate oligarchy, with capitalism for the poor and socialism for the rich. How does it work? Oh that’s easy:

When we - you and I - fuck up our business and our finances, the bankers and the corporations take our stuff.

BUT . . .

When BANKERS and CORPORATIONS fuck up THEIR businesses and THEIR finances, the bankers and the corporations still take our stuff!

It’s a great system, if you’re a central banker or a corporatist multi-billionaire. Remember the S&L Crisis? The Bush family made a whole pile of money with that scam. This is how the wealth transfer (from us to them) is to work, AGAIN, with Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac: The U.S. Government plans to buy a huge interest in these failing banks using OUR MONEY. Our parents’ money. Our children’s money. Our grandchildren’s money.

Imagine that they raided your bank accounts and used it to buy stock in ENRON a month before the company’s systemic collapse. Then Talking Heads on the boob tube said “ENRON is critical to the stability of our energy supply. It’s too big to fail.” You would have stormed the ENRON corporate offices to kick some corporatist ass. Am I right, or am I right?

Today we get some anti-bailout fussing from the smart people who know they’re about to get fleeced, AGAIN. Then George Bush insults us further by saying “This is not a bailout.”

[squinting] “You see, [muffled snicker] it’s not a bail-out, [inappropriate smirk] because although the public will assume their debt, [momentary confusion] they’ll remain private corporations. It’s a sell-out! [giddy pride] [poked in back] I mean, it’s definitely not a bail-out. [satisfied nod] Now watch this drive.”

I say let them ALL fail. These are privately owned banks. They made bad business decisions, so they deserve to fail. Their stock prices NEED to go down. The banks NEED to restructure, and the banking executives NEED to be punished for being a bunch of greedy criminals. THAT’s capitalism. THAT’S the “free market economy.” Perhaps the U.S. ought to try it sometime.

In the mean time, we get to support their lifestyles, and we don’t even get to divorce the bitches.

The notorious asshole Karl Rove, also known as “Bush’s Brain,” has been under pressure to testify in front of the House Judiciary Committee. Not surprisingly, he disappeared on the 10th for an unannounced “vacation.” He’s been located in Crimea, which has no extradition treaty with the U.S.

It figures. This is how they’ll all get away with it: Unannounced “vacations” to countries that don’t extradite. The Bush/Cheney henchmen were counting on pardons, but if Bush is impeached he won’t be able to issue any. The only way the U.S. will be able to keep the NeoCONS on campus, so to speak, is to ground all outgoing international flights until every last suspected war criminal is rounded up and “detained” in an “undisclosed location.” And we know THAT won’t happen.

I suppose the Bush/Cheney juntas have made SO many enemies that it’s only a matter of time before a family member of a tortured Abu Grahib “detainee” hunts ‘em down and shoots ‘em. I won’t cry.

H/T: The Zoo

UPDATE: The Lang Report has set up a “Karl Watch” vigil.

Once a government is committed to the principle of silencing the voice of opposition, it has only one way to go, and that is down the path of increasingly repressive measures, until it becomes a source of terror to all its citizens and creates a country where everyone lives in fear.

-Harry S. Truman

This week the traitors in Washington, also known as the U.S. Senate, sold out the Constitution again. Cowed by NeoCon scare tactics, with their pockets stuffed with wads of cash bribes campaign contributions from SPRINT, VERIZON and AT&T, the Senate passed FISA legislation undermining your Fourth Amendment right not to be subject to unwarranted search and/or seizure.

This is not a “compromise,” as some in Congress would have us believe. The only things they compromised are your personal privacy and your freedom.

(Check out the Billboard Liberation Front!)

The FISA Amendments Act allows for mass, untargeted and warrantless surveillance of all communications coming into and out of the United States. As an extra-special kick in the shorts, it hands immunity to telecommunication companies for their role in domestic spying. This means YOUR phone calls can be tapped and emails read for practically no reason at all, and there’s no chance to learn how the telecoms invaded your privacy after the fact.

Mark my words: Warrantless wiretapping is ALREADY being used to stifle dissent, blackmail politicians and destroy careers for partisan political purposes. And if you don’t think they’re reading your emails, and creating a comprehensive profile on you based upon what you write about yourself on your MySpace and Facebook pages, and especially your Plaxo profile, you have another thing coming. Are you a “Peace Mom?” Ever been to an anti-war or anti-globalization rally? There is an FBI case file on you.

In the days leading up to the House and Senate votes on the FISA bill the howling from American patriots and civil rights activists was louder than it had been in years. The Senators’ phones were ringing off the hook. Unfortunately, it was too late: The American public, Boobus Americanus, has remained parked on it’s sofa, remote in one hand and a soda in the other, for SO LONG, that once it occurred to the public that they were being spied upon Soviet-style it was too late to do anything about it. Congress had already been bought off by a bunch of paranoid, control freak plutocrats OVER A PERIOD OF DECADES, chipping away at the Constitution bit by little bit with laws and Executive Orders. Regardless, Boobus Americanus either stayed home on voting day or kept on electing it’s congresscritters over and over and over again.

Conservatives especially HATE the ACLU, turning the acronym into a synonym for traitor. What an asinine reversal. Sure the ACLU chooses some weird cases to fight, but they’re fighting on Constitutional principle, and they are doing it for YOUR SAKE. You snooze, you lose, folks. So NOW you care?

If this bugs you the way it bugs me, consider becoming an ACLU monthly donor, and stand up for your rights.This is why the ACLU challenged this unconstitutional law the moment President Bush signed it. If you’re a so-called “conservative” who EVER dissed the ACLU without understanding what it was all about, consider DOUBLING your donation as penance for being an IDIOT.

Boobus Americanus

(by Ed Griffin)

It’s more than mortal man can bear.

Those terrorists are everywhere:

on land and sea and in the air.

Network TV bill of fare

daily warns us to prepare

for bugs and bombs and poison air

and other things enough to scare

the bravest man to deep despair.

They hate our liberty, or so we’re told,

our way of life so uncontrolled,

our rich, our poor, our young, our old.

I guess their hatred just takes hold

and burrows in and makes them bold

enough to kill and die and spend their gold

and set in motion plans untold

to get us ALL . . . or so we’re told.

Seems strange to me they don’t resent

the other guys who represent

a way of life with free consent

or those who are benevolent.

The only ones they seem intent

to devastate to great extent

are those who’s aero-planes were sent

to bomb their homes with such torment.

Never mind, the war will stay.

We’re going to fight this all the way.

But there’s a price we have to pay

to keep the enemy at bay.

Let our leaders take away

our lives and liberty TODAY,

and then our fears will go away

that they’ll be lost some future day.

My phone is tapped. My mail is read.

They know the thoughts inside my head.

The money I deposited

is now reported to the Fed.

They chip my hand, dispense my bread.

I think they watch me go to bed.

I don’t object. I’m glad instead

to be controlled until I’m dead.

CHORUS

And so I very happily

let them take my liberty.

No matter what they do to me,

it’s all for my security.

You see, you see, you see?

I’m just as glad as I can be

to let them take my liberty.

No matter what they do to me,

it’s all for my security.

(Source: I thought this last image was from an article in Rolling Stone called “Fear Factor”), but I went back and it’s not there)

Moi, the Hedonistic Pleasureseeker, is fussy about my water.

I usually drink distilled water or spring/mineral water as I refuse to suffer the proven adverse mental health effects of fluoridated tap water. Yesterday I was overjoyed to discover that the township that I live in does not fluoridate it’s water supply. WOOT!!!

Unfortunately, between 60 and 70 percent of the country is not so fortunate. Americans are more likely to encounter fluoridated water in large towns and cities than in smaller, outlying townships. Since most of humanity clusters in urban areas guess what? Unless you take special efforts to remove the additives from your water you’re probably drinking crap, and a Brita filter won’t cut it, either. No matter what the ads tell you, the filters you buy at the store WILL NOT remove fluoride from your tap water.

So what’s wrong with fluoride? I’m glad that you asked.

Calcium fluoride is naturally present in some mineral waters and even some foods, but that’s not the chemical you should be worried about, because what’s being put in America’s water supplies is not calcium fluoride. Do a little digging and you’ll discover that it’s something much, much worse. In fact, the so-called “fluoride” being dumped in 60-70% of our drinking water is so poisonous that only a few parts per billion are apparently enough to lower our children’s IQs. Influential operatives sliming the corridors of power have known this all along, which TOTALLY pisses me off, SO . . . Full report after the jump, and it’s NOT a Hedonistic Pleasure.

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It worked when I was a kid, and it still works today:  A bowl of ice cream and a bubble bath in the dark makes the mean old crabbies go bye bye.  It’s the perfect thing to do before bed. All better now!

Vagina Spa Opens in New York

Now comes the first medi spa in Manhattan wholly dedicated to strengthening and grooming a woman’s genital area. Phit — short for pelvic health integrated techniques — is to open this month on East 58th Street.

Dr. Lauri Romanzi, a gynecologist who performs pelvic reconstruction surgery, said she came up with the idea for the spa one day while walking by an outlet of BriteSmile, the tooth-whitening chain. She liked that the stores cater to people with healthy teeth.

The spa is essentially a gussied-up examination room down the hall from Dr. Romanzi’s medical practice. At the spa, the signature treatment will be a $150 gynecological exam — in which a client contracts her pelvic muscles around Dr. Romanzi’s fingers — to determine by feel whether muscle tone is weak, moderate or strong.

And here I thought Americans had already achieved the pinnacle of narcissism. Is it really possible that women have gotten so LAZY that they’re outsourcing their Kegel exercises? Is the Apocalypse at hand? Honestly, I don’t believe it necessary that we ape Rome during it’s epic fall.

Besides, this is what intimate friends are for: To be personal trainers for our privates. Frankly, I think this kind and level of personal service requires a house call. Failing that a resourceful woman can just pull up her Puss-n-Bootstraps and use her own fingers. The DIY approach is easy and free.

I wonder: Will the good Doctor be holding Kegel aerobics classes? (I can see it now: “Come on, girls, squeeze! Squeeze! One two three four!”). She might as well go all the way and hold pong ball distance competitions and “throat pilates” while she’s at it. Any doctor specializing in something so asinine as “vaginal rejuvenation” is likely to be of the “alter your pussy to fascinate your man” mindset. If she’s going to devote her career to insulting women’s vaginas she might as well go all the way.

What’s she gonna call the place, Spagina? She should pipe Barry White muzak throughout the spa: “It feels so good . . . Oh, what a groove You have no idea how it feels, My hands just won’t keep still . . . Oh baby oh baby . . .”

Men, inquire within as to the availability of towel boy and technician internships.

One would think that if the Hedonistic Pleasureseeker were a Muppet she would be Miss Piggy, yes? But one would be oh so wrong.

Surely she has her bitchy and grand Miss Piggy moments, having pretty much nailed the seventh and most deadly sin VANITY. However, depending on the time of the month she is also a female version of either Gonzo or Beaker: Adorably weird and introspective, or a babbling freakout mess, usually over world events she can do absolutely nothing about.

The coming demise of the American economy via the debauching of our dollar currency (see: HYPERINFLATION and STAGFLATION) will soon provide the Hedonistic Pleasureseeker plenty of nothing for which to express much ado. It will take a freaking miracle to save us now. Perhaps instead of Blogging the Apocalypse the Hedonistic Pleasureseeker would be better off with a martini and a mild sedative?

NeoCons are more than just evil: They’re also a bunch of cowards.

Several alternative news sites, news aggregators and web logs critical of U.K., European, U.S. and Israeli governments are frequently hacked or victims of Denial-of-Service attacks. These onslaughts are so pervasive, large-scale and aggressive that they are likely financed by people with very deep pockets: Either the governments themselves, their private sector puppeteers, or their hired henchmen.

(What we call NeoCons here in the U.S. are called NeoLiberals in the U.K. I suppose that in this context “neo”= “new” = “has nothing to do with the original.” Basically, they are all frauds.)

In my opinion, frequent cyberattacks are a pretty good indicator that these news and opinion sites are telling the truth: Why else would such extreme efforts be put into shutting down the discourse or silencing free speech? What are the financiers of these hacking attempts afraid of?

Think about it: If the information posted at these alternative sites is misguided or incorrect, honest representatives of the blameless governmental body should counter with: “You are mistaken, here is the truth, and here are the links to our evidence.” Why? Because it’s the cheapest, most effective way to counter an unfavorable message with a better one. It takes an awful lot of money, time and people-power to just plain shut down the opposition.

Bottom line: NeoCon attempts to stifle alternative websites are pathetic and will fail in the long run. NeoCons may be evil, sneaky and rich, but they are outnumbered by regular folks hellbent on telling the truth.

CANADA is fighting the NAU . . . howbout you?

This is the trailer for a new documentary, produced by Canadians, about resisting the North American Union (NAU). If you’ve not been paying attention, the NAU is the globalistas’ plan to merge the US with Canada and Mexico, into one Superstate, much like the European Union that the Irish want no part of. Canadian citizens are not thrilled by this plan and who blames them? They see what Bush has done to this country; why would they want to live in an American police state where they have no rights? And where will OUR young men run to get away from the draft, if we turn into one big police state? Siberia?

Anyway. Check it out: Notice how anti-NAU activists exposed the agent provacateurs at the Montecello summit (they were undercover police), simply by confronting them and ordering them to take off their masks and show their faces.

That’s how you do it, folks! This is a stealth coup that can only be stopped using the weapon of EXPOSURE.

The Security and Prosperity people meet in secret. This is because the SSP is about THEIR security and prosperity at OUR expense (literally and figuratively). They don’t reveal their activities. Many of the operatives don’t even reveal their own names. And Congress? Congress is also kept in the dark.

What to do, what to do? We can do is root out the conspiracy, trumpet out the facts and ask the Canadian, U.S. and Mexican populations: Is this what WE the PEOPLE want? If the answer is “yes,” then I’m pretty sure We the People would like a voice in how to implement it. If NO, then case closed, because governments serve at the whim of the people, not the other way around. Sometimes our governments need to be reminded of this.

The letter to America that can be read after the “jump” is written by bestselling author Congressman Paul. His latest book, The Revolution: A Manifesto, has been on the New York Times bestseller list for months without a peep from the mainstream media. Imagine how popular the book would be if the man got some press! I have the book; it’s blessedly concise (read: short), and it’s good.

From the Campaign for Liberty, SOMETHING BIG IS GOING ON. Dr. Paul has written another letter that lays it all out for us. There’s a big storm brewing and it’s a comin’ our way, and we will be faced with some important choices. What will we do? Will we:

1. Look to the governments and bank controllers of the world to “save” us (ahem: Hurricane Katrina anyone?)

OR

2. Put our OWN thinking caps on and get busy OURSELVES. Maybe authoritarian government, fiat money and centralized banking control weren’t such good ideas after all.

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So many midpoints, so little patience. I’m half way through my summer classes: Midterm tests and papers are complete, and I’m gearing up final tests and papers. I will never take TWO summer classes at the same time again! By August I shall be free, but for now I don’t have much time for anything except homework.

Bunny didn’t get the summer job that she wanted, so she’s making money doing extra work around the house. It’s cut my own housework burden in half! Now if only I didn’t STILL have to scream at her to get her to do it.

I am half way to my weight goal. I’m enjoying my cardio very much these days. I love breaking a sweat because - and I know this probably seems weird - it gives me flashbacks of my nights at the burlesque. The dance bug may be biting me again soon, and I can’t wait until August to find out!

Half of me wants to start dating again and half of me doesn’t. Andrew has been calling; he wants me to fly out to Hollyweird to see him again and has offered to cover all my expenses. I enjoy his company (in measured doses) and it seeing him would more than make up for my Summer Sex deficit, BUT. I’m really starting to wonder about the man: I think he may actually be a sex addict, and by that I mean more than the typical man: I mean NOT in a happy kind of way, but in an anxious and seeking relief via constant, rapid-release sex way. I’m anxious enough these days without adding THAT to my vibe. I want a man to DOUBLE my pleasure, not cut it in half!